Some people who know me well enough must have known that I do complaining,quite a lot. I don’t like being uncomfortable,but who does?
But, I am pretty selective to whom I talk my complaints. Mostly, it is le husband or else the diary or this virtual friend. I rarely complaint to my friends.
I feel tired easily recently,might be due to the pregnancy. Oh,please don’t misunderstand this. I am beyond happy about this little one. The problem is that sometimes i feel these people in my surrounding really seem less care that I can’t be as tired as before.
I thank God that I am still being able to go work quite comfortably,but the houseworks tire me often. I really tried my best to keep up but still as it is getting bigger,it is getting harder too. It is getting more difficult to meet others’ expectation and being okay at the same time.
For.example,about the meals. I really put much effort to arrange the daily menu. Not only once,but thrice a day. I consider when le husband is home, what food my father seem like having for dinner, what to serve when I am teaching till evening, who will eat the leftover (mostly I do) and when to eat it,and so on.
I become very annoyed when I had prepared the meals then suddenly there is one who said that they ate out or already had the dinner. I don’t mind they are eating out at all but I really insist that at least they let me know, so I can prepare as many as people who eat. It saves my energy a lot.
If others just can sleep and rest after they are home, I can’t. Right after I arrived home, I have to take care and prepare for dinner and everything. No matter how tired. Then after the dinner, clean up all the leftover and other tiny little things that need to be done. I don’t have any other option beside doing that. Then after that, I just have to cope up with this ‘sesek’ tummy everytime I feel so tired.
This is the last day of Ramadhan. In the previous years, it had been always exciting because everybody was home,cleaning up the house, it felt so good. This Ramadhan only me and dad are here. I have been cleaning since yesterday and I don’t feel excited at all. I only feel tired. Mbak wi will be absent for three days as usual and it should be ok,but this year I am alone. I don’t mind washing the dishes or else for few days, but it usually we divide the job but it seems that I have to do this alone this time.
My mother’s death brought so many changes in this family. In my life,particularly..