Posted in The Big Three

Start small and slow

One day maybe Langit really needs to know her parents’ situation when she was born. So, cipi-kun, read this one day,ok?

We (finally) married in the end of 2012 after 10 long and full of drama years. Lets save the drama stories for another time.

Le husband enrolled residency just two weeks before the wedding. It was Nov,30th when the result was out. The very same day when mum left. I was glad that I was able to tell her before she went that le husband really made it after failed in his first attempt.

The next two weeks were the most least-courage days in my life. It was so gloomy preparing your wedding and the tahlil at the same time. In two weeks, this home set up the tent twice. First, a tent with bendera kuning and two weeks later a tent with janur kuning.
So,the wedding was on like mum wanted it to be. Lets once again save the wedding day story later.

We had no honey-moon since le husband was so busy with his school. At that time, I also just returned from Hajj and just finished my master in Malaysia. We kinda took turn in enrolling school. So, when we first married both of us were basically jobless. I had my music school work, but we could consider it none since I was on leave for Hajj and the wedding. On leave means no income. If I looked back, it was so risky and nekat, I would say.

But then, we really must believe that you will never be alone as long as you ask. Allah’s maths was nothing like human’s. He truly provided everything that we needed from every possible ways that we never even thought about it.

When I was worried how we could afford our monthly expenses and other bills then He solved it merely through a phone-call asked me to add my teaching days. Another blissful thing is the workplace is just 5 minutes walking distance from home. It is such great luxury.

We decided to postpone of having baby until le husband finished his first semester which was a very smart decision. Our first days of wedding filled with his residency things. Money spent here and there, very often no weekend, while weekdays spent mostly in hospital too. Few days he even arrived home at midnight. Once we had a weekend, a phone call from senior came and ruined it. We even once had to give one of our wedding gift for his senior’s wedding since another senior asked him to look for a wedding gift just an hour before reception -_-.

In the other hand, I also was struggling between work and house-works and affairs. Took care all of mom’s financial acoounts here and there. Doing all the duties which once were mom’s. It was like having multiple jobs. My work, the house-affairs, my dad affairs, and of course the marriage.

That was the time when I realized how much my mum had been doing all through her life with us.

We were pretty tight budget for the first few months. But, slowly it was getting better and better. After six months, I had another job which suited me well in the term of time,location and number. So, I was pretty lucky having two jobs that I liked a lot. Le husband also started to get paid when he had night shift at some hospitals.

We’ve been married for 1,5 years when we first knew that Langit was on her way. The night when we knew, we were just staring at each other and laugh. Glad of course,and a bit worry, bien sur.

Although we both had pretty decent income together every month, it seemed only sufficient for both of us. Having a baby would be a bliss, but it also came with other consequences. All the good and best things always have its price. That was why the weekend after we found out, we visited two nearest hospitals to ask some information about the doctor, the facilities, and the price to give birth there.

In spite of a pretty different range of price, we decided to choose the more expensive one since we felt more comfortable there. I think, in the term of health, education, and nutrition, parents should give the best that they could. The cost of those three things should become a meaningful reason to work harder for their child.

As the belly was getting bigger, the income was getting smaller since I decided to lessen my teaching hours. I even asked earlier on-leave than the prediction time which turned out to be a very good decision because Langit also arrived earlier.

Meanwhile, our expenses also were getting bigger. The same month when Langit arrived, it was le husband’s first month of being at the level where he was the one who had to pay for the meal when he had his night shift. It means that he should pay for the meal of 15-20 people, dinner and breakfast, even lunch snack. More, on that first month, he had 6 night shifts schedule which equals to 6 times providing the meals. It costed us one-third of a total hospital fee when Langit was born.
To be honest,if I looked back, it gave me racing and aching heart to let the money we had been saving for months were gone just like that -_-.

Alhamdulillah Langit came through vaginal-birth which really a cost-saving for us. We had prepared the money for caesarian birth. We had to, since we promised we wont count on other’s help for this, even the parents. But, alhamdulillah, the help came from everywhere. My parents, my aunts, and many others.

For this one, if I looked back, it gave me such a great relief at heart that we didn’t have to withdraw our deposit money in the end:D

During those three months without income, I really count on solely on my saving or in the other words mantab: makan tabungan. To add some more, le husband was also sent to Ruteng for a month in January, then got Fatmawati hospital duty on February. Two months of having no income, both of us.

It was scary. Yet, we managed to get through it.

Now, we slowly try to get back to our normal income after those three mantab months. Yes, slowly, since I had no one to help taking care Langit when I go back to my teaching schedule before. Meanwhile, I had not enough courage,bravery, and intention to do that. To leave her with someone unrelated whom I didn’t who. Worse, we even had to pay highly for that. I just couldn’t do that. Couldn’t materially and mentally afford the costs.

We’re getting better as Langit is getting taller and bigger. Although her vaccine price seems to be getting higher and higher. But, no worry Cipi, let us do our duty, you only have to be healthy and happy:)

Until now, It is still hard sometimes,yes. But, we had been through many things beyond our expectation. I don’t feel that we are being left alone in every single thing that we face. There has always been help.

In spite of starting small and slow, alhamdulillah those have been sufficient. So, there is no need to worry about being small and slow, there is Him who will make it sufficient.

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Pas special, J'ai seulement besoin de beaucoup de privee

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