Posted in Past learning, Thoughts

Finish What You Have Started

That was one of my mom’s best saying. One of the most unforgettable one.

She said it once when I told her about giving up piano lesson. I have written about this Piano thing before, long and boring. How I survived those 13 years of piano lessons and so on. But, it is not what I want to write here now.

I saw several times some parents who are againts forcing the children about something that they don’t like. I once agreed to this when I was 10 or 11. Why, why, why I should do something that I really didn’t like. It was hard, boring, scary, and gave me lots of pressure. And this happened just because my mom wanted to be able to play piano but she didn’t have the chance.

Her first intention when she was going to YPM was to register herself. Yes, she wanted to enroll to a piano course. But, the admin said that it wasn’t for adults. They only accepted children within certain range of age to learn there. So, out of the blue, instead of writing her name, she wrote mine. So that was how my long and hard journeys of 13 years of piano lessons began.

I remembered clearly how hard it had been. It wasn’t bad. It was just very hard. For someone who has no talent, not strong enough desire, it was dead end. I spent a lot of time being scolded by my teachers. I wondered what I was really doing there.

YPM is a music school like a real school. It has certain schedule within a year. You can’t go in or out whenever you please. The teachers were mostly the strict one. But, they were also having a very good qualifications. Lots of them were graduated from well-known music universities in Europe.

My grade 6 teacher was one of the most frightening teacher there. It was such a big achievement to survive two years of piano lesson with her. Maybe one couldn’t believe if I said instead of an hour of lesson, she gave three. Three long hours. I entered the room at 18.30 and went out at 21.30. She made me do a hundred times of trill and arpeggio until I nailed it. Subhanallah.

I was experiencing too many hard times so it is impossible to write it all. But, it surely made me promised myself, I would never done things like this to my future children. Never.

But then, yeah, you should never say never. I slowly changed my mind when I passed grade 6 and learning at the higher level. It was a good feeling to be one of the PK students. It was really something.

Then, I totally changed my mind when the real results of this 13 years of journey appeared. Right from few months after I graduated, when my mum called in one afternoon. She had a call about me passed the teacher audition in another well known music school. Received that one call, I seemed to forget all those hard times that I had been going through for 13 years.

I could never count how much this piano has been helping me until today. It has been amazing the way all those 13 years is being paid. This thing really help me in almost everything I have done.

It doesn’t allow me to be jobless even for one day since I finished my bachelor degree. Even not when I pursued my master degree abroad. During my four months break, it was this piano which helped me so I could get some money to save for later.

It helped me nailed every single.job interview I had done. Again, it amazed me how the only thing that all interviewers were having interest in common was about piano. Until my very last interview in 2013, Piano had never been absent.

If we’re talking about current situation, then it even gives me more and more. Because of this piano, I have a choice about the way I earn my money. I have a choice to stay at home and be with Langit without being jobless. I was able to help le husband during this residency. We survived the first six months of the marriage just from my piano salary.

Not only for me and my little family, this piano allows me to take care my father almost in everything. Not knowing my mum would be gone too fast, I couldn’t imagine how would it be if my mom really gave me the choice to quit.

So, after knowing all those above, I don’t think I can keep the promise I once made. After went through everything and being shown how hard work and patience were being paid, I don’t think I can do my promise.

I think parents have eyes to see what the children haven’t and are not be able to see in everything. I still considered the best gift my mom gave to Langit is this piano. Because she made me survived and endured all those pains, I am be able to be present for my daughter. This is priceless.

When the time comes, I might repeat what my mom once had done to me. What makes me afraid is, I don’t have enough strength to make Langit goes through everything that I did.

Oh, all my brother and sister were going to YPM too. But, they failed to complete it, not even grade 6. I really hope later Langit will be doing much better than me. At least, she has one thing better than me. She has someone who understand about this.

Well, guess it’s time to sleep already.

Hope you finish what you have started and enjoying the great results of your hard work.

Good night.


Pas special, J'ai seulement besoin de beaucoup de privee

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