Posted in Thoughts

Relationship Skill

The famous Multiples Intelligences Theory by Howard Gardner stated that everyone has intelligences in different areas. Now, it has already been up to nine items consist of verbal-linguistic, mathematical logical, visual-spacial, bodily-kinesthetic, intrapersonal, interpersonal, musical, naturalistic, and spiritual.
When I read about this theory at the first time, I directly knew my strongest one was Intrapersonal. While my weakest one was the other side, Interpersonal.

I’ve never been really good at socializing. Yet I still manage having several social medias. But, all of those things don’t require me to have direct interactions. Not face to face. It makes me uncomfortable being with unfamiliar people.

When it comes to relationship, I found it’s been hard. Even until now. I was so easy to feel uneasy when knowing someone was approaching. It was even more and more uncomfortable when they were taking real actions. Bah. The only thing I felt most comfortable was having one-sided crush where I only had to deal with my own feeling. Sad but true.

When it comes to marriage, it feels even harder. I found several (or maybe many) times that it sucked to let your feeling depended on other’s action. You couldn’t help expecting more from someone you’re married to. From those tiny unimportant things until the crucial ones. Then maybe that what makes some marriages fail.
We tend to be dissapointed by the person we care about much. The more you care then the more you’ll be dissapointed.

After three years of marriage, other than being in love with someone you’re married to, there’s another skill that one requires to master : managing expectations. I am still pretty far from good about that. I am still the one who brags more about what I have been done and what the other side hasn’t been done. The one who tends to forget the good things from the other, yet seem remember too well about herself.

Currently feel a bit tired of several things and also missing few things from the old days. When two people unites, it supposes they will have more, won’t they? I don’t know why I (currently) feel losing more.

Thus, I (currently) really try hard to get those things that make me happy back. The routine morning exercise, the sunnah fasting, a proper time to enjoy myself. That’s the only thing I can do since yah, the best thing you can rely on is yourself.

Taking care people can be so exhausting. Especially for a selfish person like me. Even more, when it is very least appreciated. Yes, I do expect appreciation. I am not that kind and generous. Sorry.

Maybe I am just the ungrateful, the hard to please, not sincere, and other not nice things to name. But really, nice has never been my middle name. I find it’s harder pretend to be nice. I am allowing my self to be judged unpleasantly since like this blog tagline said :

You know my stories. Not what I have been going through.

Sigh. Such a harsh post in this gloomy day. Then, have a gloomier day, dear you!


Pas special, J'ai seulement besoin de beaucoup de privee

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