Posted in Langit Senja, Thoughts


Several big things marked this year as a turning point year. To call this year exciting, yes, it has been a full of new adventure one.

On Motherhood

Two big milestones achieved within few months differences. Toilet training has been unlocked since the beginning of the year. Not smooth but turned out easier than I thought it would be. First day was the hardest. The rest were manageable.

The second is weaning without night terror! Langit turned three last November and she gradually stopped being breastfed days before her birthday. After so many articles about ways of  weaning, reading and hearing from here and there, weaning is about a readiness. That would be different from one mother to another. I knew very well I wasn’t ready for weaning when she turned two. Thus, breastfeeding kept going until she turned three. Then, it just happened quite smoothly. She just stopped looking for it while the mantra had been continously repeated.

Two big milestones as a mother (and for the baby of course) checked this year. Alhamdulillah.
School starts rolling in progress. We have done a trial once to a school which we think suits her well. She nailed to survive three hours alone without any dramas. We even left her for the last an hour.

But, everything is still being considered. We have another concern about her schooling and it hasn’t been clearly decided well.

On Family

The biggest loss this year happened in February when my grandma passed away. A precious chance given to be able to accompanied her on her last breath while whispering tahlil on her ear. 

A family trip across the continent happened in April. The very first time arranging a trip to the very least details because of my father. Such a great learning from budgeting, planning, and executing it. UK trip to three cities was one of this year highlights. After having An autumn in Paris, Spring in London and made the doctor set his feet on the sacred Anfield stadium was one of the best things happened this year.

Checking one of each other’s biggest dreams unlocked.

On Relationship and Personal Growth

Entering the sixth year, marriage is surely not on my most favorite list, but just like those thirteen years of piano lesson, if I were given a chance to go back, I would take the same path, with the same person. For better or worse, whatever happen in the future, no regret for this one.

This year, the relationship grows bigger than we expect. Starting from a high school-english course friends, went through lots of things before the marriage, a married couple, then we become a bussiness partner this year.

Started from a very serious pillow talk, executing plans one by one, from July to August, we bravely started one of our personal big dreams together : running our own bussiness. It’s been only several months and we keep fighting to survive. 

Running a bussiness is very far from cool, it’s a headache and sometimes I feel like resigning and give up. Through this one, I learn to tame my own fear, to face things that I prefer avoiding before, to deal with many people, to solve problems that I would never think of before, to get my ass off from my comfortable couch and do more things other than watching korean dramas, to spend and to borrow some big amount of money beyond my narrow-minded calculations, betting on this one to be succeed. 
I really hope for more strength to survive in this jungle next year.
On Residency

I am not really sure where to put residency since it wasn’t my own thing. But then, residency is never a one man show. A long hard tough and rocky residency finally meets its end this year, to be precise, this month. It started on December 2012 and met its end on the very same month five years later. Graduation is only few months away.

Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah.

The plans after this one are still on progress while keep asking for the best thing to be appointed for us. Wherever, whatever and whenever it will be.

A closing 

Since 2012, heading to a new year feels pretty anxious. Not knowing what the future holds, and having one or two big plans also scare me knowing it would have come with some twists too. What secures me is only by knowing there is a much bigger strength that would keep me save from any harm that I couldn’t handle, as long as I believe and don’t give up.

Wishing for another new year blessed with more patience and strength


Pas special, J'ai seulement besoin de beaucoup de privee

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