Posted in Thoughts

Da Capo and Dal Segno : End of Year Note

For the last two years, at the end of December, I did a summary or some rant about things that happened in that year or my feelings about that. I didn’t plan to write any for this year. Not that I dont want to, but due to the high level anxiety towards next year. But, such incredible year is too important to let go.

If there’s anything we could take from everything we have been through this year, it is truly a great reminder to return and take care, first and foremost, basic things in life.

Mastering basic habits like sleep,eat and daily exercise well is a great advantage. Three things that have strong impact to our overall health, physically and mentally. Been writing few times that staying sane could be the most important achievement to deal with this year. Doing those three basic religiously is the (only) way to stay sane.

It’s also the year which truly show the real face of a country. Facing the same test given, each country deal with it differently. We surely have different situation and resources, but the main weapons to beat this pandemic are totally the same everywhere : wear your mask, wash your hands, avoid the crowd.

The main difference is the people. Personally, it feels like watching the result of the failure or the success from one’s educational system. I once wrote something about this here and just few weeks ago I found this picture below and voila, those the most resilience during this pandemic are exactly the same country with the best education system.

Reviewing the last 10 months of the situation here, lack of understanding and implementation about basic things and characters since early age is the root of all evils happened in this country and this pandemic brings out the worst of it.

We’re currently watching the result on the absence of some basic skills that supposed to be nurtured and mastered since early childhood :

Self discipline to deal with themselves in any situations. Following the rules, knowing right from wrong (like stealing social fund during this pandemic, really??), and many more.

Empathy to deal with others without prejudice, whatever background they have (like a neighbourhood who treats their own neighbour who suffers from covid like a germ that should be killed, I am lost for words).

Strong literacy and numeracy to understand how things work, the real situation scientifically, and make decision based on that (unlike the stupid useless government who’s been neglecting their people with their ignorance, killed so many who could have been saved, the highest death number of health care workers, and so many more).

I could go really long with this, but I wont.

This year is when gratitude and anxiety collide. Sometimes, it’s overwhelmingly confusing because you dont know which is the right one to feel. Looking back all the things happened, personally, it’s been a year full of countless blessings and a mere thank you to express the gratitude is not enough. It’s hard indeed, but to consider it’s bad, it doesn’t fit the definition.

But, whenever I look outside, it’s painful. I hope nothing but sincerely pray for everyone who’s been dealing with the hardships would be given the strength to keep going. This too shall pass.

Looking forward to next year, it would be a different battle to deal with. For me, January has always been the darkest winter. Literally and figuratively. By next week, we will return to the less humane (a polite way to say inhumane) shift schedule for the doctor.

My anxiety level was soaring while reading next month schedule yesterday and it’s only few days from now. Bad thought were running wild uncontrollably. The only way to soothe this is through the best ikhtiar and the highest tawakkul. Accept that we have no slightest power to control about the future nor the past.

Is the anxiety gone now? You bet.

Borrowing one of musical terms, 2021 seems like a Da Capo of previous years ago regarding few things like the shift schedule, some of daily life stuffs. In the other hand, it seems like a Dal Segno for certain part regarding the things happened outside. Like in London and some countries, it’s almost totally back to March again.

But, just like every Da Capo and Dal Segno, they all lead to al Fine. So we hope for this pandemic. It will lead to the end, although it would be best to keep our expectation low about the when.

Hope everyone always stay safe, healthy, and sane.


PS : It’s quite hard to keep the tone that I want in the usual year end post.


Pas special, J'ai seulement besoin de beaucoup de privee

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